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This web page is dedicated to every good guy out
there searching for a good woman. A woman that’s able to hold
a conversation, mature enough to handle criticism, honest enough to tell
you the truth without hours of pointless fluff to pacify her guilt.
A woman that’s caring, kind and considerate--one that’s selfless enough
to sacrifice time she could spend with you so that you may work towards
goals that will supplement your blooming relationship. A woman that’s
intelligent enough to realize the difference between love, lust, friendship
and wishful thinking. A woman that’s not such a coward that she has to
resort to the crutch of friendship when rejecting someone. A woman that’s
not afraid to confront her insecurities and weaknesses. A woman that won’t
stab you in the back and manipulate your emotions with guilt trips,
withdrawal, and endless sulking. A woman
that’s patient and empathetic enough to help you develop the tools necessary
to harbor a long-lasting relationship. A woman that’s not so petty as to
let a good thing slip through her fingers in favor of shallow, selfish,
sexual gratification.
For all you men looking for such a woman:
STOP LOOKING.
Such a woman does not exist. All women are shallow
(and by all women, I
don’t mean the hand full of women I’ve known that don’t fit this description.
If you’re finding yourself wondering whether or not you’re one of these
women, chances are that you aren’t).
What women really want...
Do you remember when you were growing up in elementary school, how many
dumbasses there were in your class? All the morons that had shitty
personalities that never changed all throughout high school? Of the
thousands of people you’ve met throughout school, chances
are that you’ve only managed to become good friends with 1 or 2 of them.
The problem that guys have is that they don’t realize that as many
dumbass guys as there were in their classes when they grew up, there are
just as many dumbass girls. The only difference is that girls are
not physically repulsive like men. If only 2 of the thousands of people
you’ve come into contact with have been good enough to become your
close friends, then what are the odds that you’re going to find someone
out of the remaining thousands that’s good enough to spend your life
with?
What girls really want is a good looking guy that will treat them like
shit. If you’re not good looking, you have to be rich. A lot of girls
are so shallow that money is enough for them to be in a relationship.
If you’re not good looking and you’re not rich, then you’re pretty
much screwed (unless the girl is horny, in which case she’ll use you
for what she wants, even if you’re ugly).
Women can’t decide anything. They never mean what they say and they always
contradict themselves. I’ve developed a translation table based on
conversations I’ve had with just a few of the many shallow women I’ve
had the misfortune of having in my life:
Translation Table:
When they say:
Oh, that’s interesting.
What they mean:
I don’t know what the hell you’re talking about. Let’s have sex.
When they say:
That’s cool, I like that too.
What they mean:
We don’t have anything in common, but I’m going to pretend to like some of
the things you like so we can have sex.
When they say:
I miss you.
What they mean:
I’m horny.
When they say:
Nothing’s wrong.
What they mean:
Pack your bags, because you’re going on a one-way guilt trip.
When they say:
I love you.
What they mean:
For the time being. I’m flaky, so check back two weeks from
now, I don’t know what the hell love means so I might just change my mind,
and besides, I want to have sex and this will give me some leverage.
When they say:
How’s it going?
What they mean:
I’m the center of the universe, don’t bother telling me, it won’t
make a difference. I just want to make it look like I’m not a cold-hearted
sex fiend.
When they say:
I’m fat.
What they mean:
Give me compliments, asshole.
When they say:
I care about you.
What they mean:
I care about me. Let’s have sex.
When they say:
Nothing.
What they mean:
I wonder if he wants to have sex.